Neiu

United States

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Findom

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Im a writer, a student, and inter, and much more. My world is vast, and deep. Definitely worth the exploration. Come find me on Twitter if you love findom.
Forum Posts (post now)
Why??
I get that there aren't super long blogs or posts on here really, but I felt it was important to put this particular post about findom on here. Its pretty long especially for this site, but it's informational and it's important that people know what they're talking about before they get into it or before they make things harder than they need to be for anybody. And that being said, those of you who need to, I hope you do read it.
6 months ago

Findom- What it is, What it isnt and the Grey Areas Inbetween {pt 2)
Ok, so we left off talking about how to get all the info about your particular dominant. Well apart from what you see in what they say, post, blog or share about themselves, you want to know about how that will be with you. They may treat every submissive differently, or maybe they've changed the way they used to do things. The best way to know, is just to contact them a find out! This is where it can get a little tricky for some, they want to know how are they supposed to find out the particular details of the situation if they can't even talk to the dominant without first tributing. My response to them is, first, again- not all dominants are the same. Some of them will provide conversation about the arrangement without expecting tribute. At the same time, they will not spend any of their time dominating you in any way, exploding any other kinks or fetishes, or engaging in anything apart from the casual conversation. On the other side of this coin, understand that you are asking a financial dominant for THEIR time and attention, even if it is a casual conversation, tribute may then be expected initially. Some dominants may even require multiple tributes to garner their attention. This can be because that's just how they do things, or because they are so good (seasoned or a vet.) at what they do, they are already busy with submissives craving for their attention. The only way to go about this fairly then, would be to give your time and attention, and whatever else you may offer, to the person who is paying the most to speak with you. ***Now this doesn't include a dominants personal submissives, ones that are already owned because in this case they already have a connection so more than likely,  that connection will always come before a newcomers money.** Moving on, here are some more key reasons why. To start, this is how you show that dominant that you're serious, and that you have a general understanding of what you're getting into. I cannot tell you how many individuals contact me and don't understand anything about the fetish, but swear that they are a “finsub” or financial submissive. Yet, when I ask them to verify by sending “x” amount, they are completely thrown off and don't understand why they have to pay when they haven't received anything yet. But as I've stated before, the money that is sent from the submissive to start, is the initial investment into the time that you're about to spend seeing if this is really for you, and if the two of you even fit well, it's almost like a trial run. And unlike the ladder, the dominant now knowing that you are serious, may give you a little taste of what to generally expect from them instead of just talking about it. It's also important for submissives to understand that dominants deal with a lot of regular people, who have no idea what they want whatsoever and want to be coached on what financial domination is, what to expect and how it all works. Because of this we like the weed out who needs to be coached and directed (to decide whether or not that's something we even want to do), and those who already know what they want, and believe it or not the perfect way to show that you already know what you want is by sending that initial tribute. It also makes the dominant more confident in speaking with you because you wont get offended once they realize that finances are in play, but sex, sexual kinks and fetishes or sexually explicit things are not and cannot be expected (again unless the dominant has stated otherwise). I will expand on this more and thoroughly go through individual details by using myself as an example, in the next blog. Last but certainly not least, it removes the time waters. Those individuals that really have no intention of paying at all, and just want to manipulate a dominant into giving all this free time and attention. It can be very emotionally and mentally exhausting for a dominate. This, on top of the lives, jobs, complete personal existence a dominant leads is a lot of work. An initial tribute shows respect for not only them, but their time as well. Time taken from elsewhere, in whole or in part, to now be directed to you and you’re not even theirs… yet. So try to understand their side. For the dominants who get asked to verify, don’t be angry. Submissives have usually gone through A LOT of trouble to find a perfect dominate. Some go into debt because of scammers, insta-dommes (these are fake dominates, who only get into the fetish to make some fast cash), even a decent bot can scam a newbieinto giving up some cash. They join multiple sites, and lets not forget, being a “submissive” is not popularized in most cultures as a “good” or”ok” thing to be. It can truly be a journey for some submissives to come to terms with accepting themselves and allowing themselves to be happy. All of this and they come to you, and just want to know you are real. “Well, its on my twitter”, fair enough, but would an old recycled video or pic of you brushing your teeth, or literally just waving “hi”, be too much? I’m not saying give free content. I legitimately get on video with them, wave “hi”, and get off. No”goodbye” so sweet departing, I just hang up. Not be be rude, but no free content.There are a lot of individuals who claim the dominate title but won’t actually do the work, or provide the attention and time. *****These individuals need to understand, bdsm is a WIDE umbrella, there's something for everyone. But do not claim what you are not. If you’re just a brat who wants to be spoiled, be that. Or a royalty who wants to be worshiped, be that. And if you want this all to happen vis finances, do that. But understand this in no way makes you a dominant, and even further, a financial dominant. In that same breathe, submissives, YOU ARE NOT A FINANCIAL SUBMISSIVE IF YOU CAN NOT PAY. Yes, even shoe subs are paying… they are buying the shoes.This is just the reality of it. You may a submissive who wants to serve, but do not call yourself a “finsub” and definitely nothing like a “paypig”, “money slave”, “cashcow” . These are specific types of submissives and if you can not pay, that's not you. Claim what you are, portray and promote yourself AS YOU TRULY ARE only in this way will you be able to be successful in whatever you are trying to do, the way you want to be.**** And submissives have their horror stories of dominant time-wasters as well. This is not one sided, and dominants need to respect that. Now once all of this is cleared, a submissive has met their dominant match, there is usually a consideration period before the submissive becomes owned, if that is even the case. Some submissives (termed "community whores") don't ever want to be owned, they want to be free to tribute, speak with and entertain as many dominants as they so choose. But for the submissives that do want to be owned, a consideration period is a time where both the dominant and the submissive enter into their new, agreed-upon arrangement, to see how it benefits them both and if they are comfortable and happy with each other, and the arrangement. During this time most dominant treat the submissive exactly how they would one that is owned by them, however, some dominants choose to treat them well, but not exactly how they would their own owned submissives (that way there's still something to wait for). So while this consideration period is happening,  which I've  found can be anywhere from a week to a month, this would be the time that the submissive would express any changes in the arrangement they prefer or the dominant would maybe give a few sessions (if they offer other Kinks and fetishes) to see if they are dynamic works past financial submission. Because sometimes during a consideration period you'll find that your dynamic is great when it comes to financial submission, however this might not be the dominant for you for a foot fetish... maybe you're not particularly attracted to this dominance feet, this would be the time to come to those understandings. After, or sometimes during, the consideration period, both may choose to walk away, one may choose to walk away, both may choose to stay, it's all about seeing how you fit, more than just the shared financial submission fetish. There are also dominants who use the consideration period to decide if they want that submissive at all, just to think on it. Meaning you don't enter a particular arrangement they just want to see how you act when you know that you're under consideration. It's a time for both to observe each other honestly, but usually the dominant to observe the submissive( because the submissive has typically already scoped out this dominant before even approaching them. But I know some dominants who don't mind approaching submissives either, so then the above-mentioned would take place). If you're wondering how to tell if a submissive is under consideration usually they will change a tag somewhere in their profile or even in their name depending on if you're on a server site, to UC which means under consideration. I have come across times where a submissive would be owned but would be allowed by their dominant to Tribute other dominants, converse with them, or even seek sessions from other dominance that their dominant does not offer. There are also times where dominants themselves will tribute other dominance and appreciation, respect, and even promotion. So Communication in this field, in any field really, is key because there are so many great areas and the only way to truly understand an individual, is by simply asking. Ultimately I think we need to have a deeper understanding of one another. Apart from kinks and fetishes, apart from dominants and submissives, we are beings. We are individuals, unique and creative in our own expression of existing. Try to get to know one another before grouping based on judgments projecting expectation and per-accusations. Each situation is different, and again I’m am not here to judge, handle yours the best way you see fit. I just hope we can start to see, we are all more similar than we are different, dominants and submissives. I do hope that my small take on it gave a bit more understanding as to what financial domination is, what it isn't, in some of the gray areas in between. Feel free to comment or message me with any questions or if there's anything that I left out because we are a community of like minded individuals in some small or big way. And this is my first blog but I'm always open to constructive criticism, thanks 🙂
6 months ago

Findom- What it is, What it isnt and the Grey Areas Inbetween {pt 1)
I've decided to talk about Findom(Financial Domination). Because the Grey Areas are getting a but annoying. THIS  IS  AN  INFORMATIVE  BLOG,  so  expect  to read 🌸 Now I realize anyone can go and look up what it is, (make sure you look up "findom bdsm" or you may have a hard time locating it.) but most don't. They want a personal explanation, so I'm going to give it to them, then direct everyone here to read it :grinning:. So to start off let's talk about what the fetish is by definition. Financial domination, “Findom” or money slavery, is a lifestyle fetish, D/s relationship, where the financial submissive (or “finsub”) is dominated in a financial way. This can be actual cash transfers, but also gifts, gift cards, reimbursement, (where the dominate will purchase/pay for goods or services with their own money and the submissive will reimburse them.)and even task specific; coffee sub, shoe sub, dress sub ect.. But the basis is that the submissive is under the financial control of the dominate to whatever extent they've agreed on. The exchange of power usually takes place with a tribute. I'd like to point out here that a tribute is a gift, it is not a payment, in any form, for something. I know there can be a lot of confusion amongst newer individuals, but also submissives, about why they haven't received something for their tribute. Unless this is something that you have negotiated with that specific dominant, you should never just expect to receive anything for a tribute. Further, I’d like to point out, like every other fetish should always be, this is completely consensual. It is a power exchange between the dominate and the submissive. Financial domination (usually) incorporates other fetishes and kinks. Some financial dominants may even use this fetish as a natural extension to, already being paid for the other fetish services that they offer. So someone maybe a financial dominate, and also participating in sessions, where other kinks and fetishes are enjoyed. But do not be mistaken, there are financial dominants who only practice THIS specific fetish. They may offer only time, attention, video chatting, pictures or even budgeting. Or just the time and attention that naturally comes with dominating a submissive, and there is nothing wrong with that. Actually, based on what I've seen and experienced myself, being a financial dominant usually brings about humiliation, manipulation, and that aspect of over all domination, is ever-present. So you're always getting something more than just the financial domination. All kinds of people get into that financial domination for all kinds of reasons. It can be for the excitement and the enjoyment of the fetish itself, it can be before the exchange of power, it can be just another version of escapism (regardless of how long you like to escape). There are some people who get into it because of self esteem issues as well, and while we're not here to judge, I highly recommend a nurturing dominate for those individuals. Funny enough, there are even entire families and partners who are involved as a collective. Like any other fetish, is an art and a craft. It involves seduction, but also connection, and it is one of those fetishes where both parties can be holistically fulfilled from each other. Everyone can always walk away happy, in my opinion, if it's done correctly. And I use the term correctly very loosely. This is because what is correct for me, might not be correct for you and that's just us having differences, and differences are okay. The only thing that I would consider to be a solid defining point on whether or not what you're doing is correct, is that it is consensual with both parties. As long as all of the terms in arrangements details are agreed upon, and there are no unwilling participants (such as a third party that will be affected either directly or indirectly,) then I feel it is correct. Now that we talked about what it is, let's talk about what it isn't. Financial domination is not prostitution, and apart from the arousal that may take place with the exchange of power it is not even particularly a sexual fetish. For instance, if a financial dominant also offers other fetish services, nine times out of ten, they're submissive is paying as a financial submissive regularly and pays separate for those sessions. Because while they do interact, they are not one and the same. That being said, this gives birth to a plethora of financial dominants. Apart from their individual personalities and general makeup, they're also incredibly different in what they provide. Not all Financial dominants will provide fetish services that have them naked or have them exposing themselves at all. A good example of this would be a financial dominant who also participates in pegging (which, contrary to popular belief, you do not have to be naked to enforce). Most of the time if a financial dominant is expressing themselves in a way that is enticing or sexually stimulating it is completely by choice and doesn't come as an expectation of being a participant of financial domination. Financial domination is also not a mean individual seeking money, it is NOT extortion. As I stated before it is an art and a craft, it is not just simply expecting to be able to aggressively demand or control someone's entire financial state from the very start. Or assuming that you will receive anything in exchange for a tribute.So to be clear, what I'm saying is that when entering into the the findom fetish, the only expectation that you should have is; there is an exchange of power via the consensual control over agreed upon finances. This takes place from one submissive party, to another dominate party. Apart from that you should not enter with any other expectations that are not specified by that particular dominant to be there. Now let's talk about just how to obtain those specifics, and what some of them may be....
6 months ago

Miss Neiu's info for Subs/pets/slave etc..
I prefer to go by Miss Neiu, Personally, I am unconventional, open and dominate by nature. I'm gentle in leading but controlling when it is needed. I can be strict, direct and terrible at small talk. I enjoy deep, probing conversations that demonstrate a certain sense of intelligence and vulnerability. Because of this, I tend to cut right through all the noise to see if we even connect enough to go this far. This does balance out with my sweet, nice side. I have a wide variety of interests, in fetishes and life alike. And I will do my best to list a few at the end of this. I'd say, for me, I'm looking for someone who knows about the lifestyle. Even if it is just the basics (as long as they are open to understanding it fully in relation to me). Someone intelligent, sweet, attentive and does with out being lead at times. Someone who wants what they will have with me, not someone doing it just because... Someone devoted, loyal and kind, who speaks politely and with manners. And someone who brings more to the table than their desire to simply serve. I'd like to have someone who wants to be apart of my realm. If you think this may be you and also find interest in mine, and what I offer, feel free to DM me here. Interests(roughly): •Exploring fetishes (most listed) •Food •Anime •Beautiful things •Animals •Books •Holistic health •The alternative •Metaphysics •Connection •Knowledge •Elegance *Special interests in female subs and femmy bois My fetishes (What pleases me/what I like to do): •Owner •Dominate •Findom •Femdom •Manipulation •Exhibitionist •Role play •Humiliation •Switch (this is rarely in play) Offer: •A home (physical/metaphorical/ spiritual) •Ownership •Domination •Roles •Rules •Tasks •Pictures •Videos •Time •Attention •Knowledge •Sessions (phone/limited video/only in person if you come to me) --All personalize to the individual and our relationship and our connection/trust level etc..-- Fetishes accepted: •Foot/stocking/panty •Bodyworship •Ebony •Role play •Findom •Femdom •Pet •Slave •Servant •Humiliation (some) •Manipulation •Cuckholding ***Hard Limits**** •Blood •Scat •Incest •Animal (k9 but also any animal) •Forced intox **subject to grow** COMMUNICATION IS KEY I can be very compromising, open to changing something or tweaking it to better suit our relationship but.. I can't fix what I don't know about. Regardless of your title (slave, sub, pet etc..) you are always welcome to ask legitimate questions or raise any concern. I'd like a happy home❤
8 months ago

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